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The Love of the Father and Mother

Many of us have not received the love of a mother or father during our childhood. So, we sometimes do not understand and find it hard to receive love from our heavenly Father whom we cannot see.

God created us to have parents to nurture us and receive that kind of love from them. When that love is missing, it becomes hard for us to give love to our own children. That is when the negative process repeats itself in each generation.

Many of us have been emotionally and spiritually damaged by incest and molestation, as well as verbal and physical abuse. Naturally, when people say to us, “God loves you,” we find it hard to receive those words. They can mean little or nothing to us because of the childhood abuse we have endured.

Many people receive mighty breakthroughs as a result of this type of forgiveness ministry. Their personal healing means that the relationships they have with their parents will be frequently restored.

When seeking to help someone, you begin by listening to their childhood story. Mark and I, depending on the need, stand in the gap one at a time for the love of the father and the mother.

For example, if someone has been abused mentally or physically by their father, you sit there with him as that parent, take his hand, and ask for forgiveness for all of the damage, the pain, and the defilement you have inflicted upon him, as though you are his real father. Then ask the person to express all that he felt as a child, as though his father was sitting in front of him. This is the time for him to let out all of his pain and bitterness. After he has let it all out, lead him in prayer, asking him to forgive his father. This replicates what Christ did at the cross when He said, “Forgive them, Father, for they know not what they do” (Luke 23:34).

Many people say they cannot forgive because it is too painful, but our response to them is this: forgiveness is a decision. Tell them it is as though they are giving that offender a gift they really do not deserve. Remember, Christ forgave us of our sins and shortcomings, so we have to forgive also.

We do not choose to forgive because we think their transgression has become meaningless. We forgive because we do not want to live in torment and bitterness anymore. We forgive to attain our own freedom from bondage. Forgiveness is the key to it all. The Bible says in Matthew 18:21-22 to forgive “seventy times seven,” every day. The forgiveness is ongoing for our own best interests.

Finally, I wish to touch on what is known as “bitter root-judgments.” Those going through the process of forgiveness must also deal with the possibility that they have done something to hurt those who first hurt them. Forgiveness of others begins the process; then, they need to ask forgiveness for anything they may have done or said in retaliation.

It’s a common thing to view someone who has hurt us and claim, “I will never be like them.” This frequently happens in response to wounding caused by a parent. Yet this vow is a bitter root-judgment that must be broken. If we fail to cancel these judgments, we end up doing the same thing against someone else because of that vow. By asking for forgiveness and breaking the bitter root-judgment, we are breaking that cycle, which ensures that the abuse has now stopped in our family line.

We would be happy to show you how we operate in standing in the gap, either for your father or mother. If bad things have happened between you and your parents, and you still feel that there are walls between you from which you desire freedom, we would like to minister to you personally. Just come up and talk to us after the session is finished.